Hi Friends! This week has been insane with mid-terms, work and starting into term papers…sometimes I wonder if I’m living through it, or just kind of floating along on top while someone else lives my life! Here’s what I’ve been chewing on this week.
Accountability…do you have it in your life? If not, find some! Last semester, I allowed busyness to exclude several mentors and close friends from my life. It was hands down one of the worst semesters of my life, as far as spiritual growth goes. This semester, I made it one of my new year’s resolutions that not only was I going to prioritize time for those people to be in my life, but I was also going to choose two or three of them to be completely and totally honest with in every area of my life.
As I have allowed myself to spend quality time with these ladies and share openly with them, I have found that three main benefits have come out of it.
1. Our relationships are deeper. As ladies of all ages often express a lack of community to me and how much they miss it, I have come to realize how beautiful and enriching it is to have true community. Not just ladies to drink tea with, but ladies to share LIFE with.
2. There has been healing in my life. Often times when events of the past hurt us, we go cover the pain and repress the memories so that we don’t have to deal with it. I was walking through life thinking I had dealt with most of the issues of the past and yet as I started talking to my “big sister” she was able to point out behaviors and beliefs in my life that are still very much a result of past hurts. I’ll never forget her telling me that my life is very much like a chronic illness (and I think this can be said of all of us), we walk around in pain…but the more pain we are in, the less we recognize it and the more we just accept it. It is only when true healing comes that we are fully aware of how much the pain was holding us back.
3. Though the temptation to sin still pops up on a daily basis, I find that it is much easier to resist it. It doesn’t mean that I’m perfect now, or that I no longer sin. However, knowing that I am going be talking with someone I love about my actions has stopped me from a lot of wrong. Whether it is thoughts, entering relationships I shouldn’t be in, or that little white lie. It’s hard to confess our sin to one another and no one wants to confess more than absolutely necessary!!!
So where are you at? Who is there that you can have a completely open relationship in order that you might grow and find freedom in your walk with Christ?
Andrea
February 25th, 2009 at 8:19 am
Great words Andrea. I think what makes accountability difficult sometimes is that people lack someone they can trust. Being open and vulnerable is a scary thing, and there is a fear of being judged. What kinds of qualities do you think should we look for in an accountability partner, and how can we be sure they can be trusted?
February 25th, 2009 at 8:29 am
it is hard! No matter how much you trust that person, it still takes a lot of courage to be totally honest with them. In finding people that I could walk this journey, i think the three key elements to look for are:
1. They love Jesus and are either at the same level or ahead of you spiritually.
2. They don’t gossip…if they aren’t telling you other people’s secrets, then chances are that they won’t be telling other people yours!
3. They love you…love you enough to be honest with you even if it hurts because they know that it is the only thing that’s going to push you forward in your walk with the Lord.
Any other thoughts out there? It’s by no means a conclusive list.