Let’s face it…as a girl, it’s pretty hard to please a chauvinist.  You’re probably not quite sure what they want.  You’re a good girl- you’d be willing to do the dishes.  To vacuum the house.  Even bear the children.  To dress up fancy.  You could tell him that he’s  man-pretty.  You’d be willing to pretty much do anything.  Tell him ‘he’s all that.’  Heck, you could even be his trophy girl.

On second thought, maybe it’s easier to just tick em off… try this one on for size:

“You know _____, you’re not half that man that I know you could be.”

He’ll be chasing his tail for a month.  “What do you mean?” he’ll retort.  You should respond with “well, I think someone as smart as you will figure it out in time.”

Dang.  That’s a challenge any dude worth his britches will take up.

Girls- you need to know that YOU can foster a godly masculinity in the guys around you.  Not seeing a lot of godly guys around you?  Call them all to a higher standard, and only let one pursue you when he is consistently soaring.

Which begs the question, do you even know what a godly man could actually do?  What is mankind capable of?  What are our brothers, dads, boyfriends, fiances, and husbands capable of?  How can we help them get there?

I came across this quote at the beginning of the week and it has been on my mind ever since….

” Christ cared about  the simple dignities. He stopped to talk to those others walked past. He loved the seemingly unlovable, touched the untouchable, and died for the unfaithful. His love went beyond His own to the unknown.”

It has challenged me to think, “How does the way I live, on a day to day basis, compare to this?!”

2 Corinthians 5:20 says that we are ambassadors for Christ - His representatives. Meaning, since He is no longer physically on the earth, we are the ones that serve as an example -to the world- of who He is.

It’s so easy to fall into a rut of loving those in our “circle of comfort” - friends, family, co-workers. But what about that person who gets on our last nerve? Those who don’t met up to our standard of living? The stranger on the street?

Over the weekend, I challenge you to examine the circle of those you love and extend it.
Befriend the friendless. Acknowledge the ignored. Step out in LOVE.

Jess

This Week’s ‘That’s What He Said’ comes from the alway hilarious Caleb Teeple.  But this time, he’s being very serious.  Great advice from a godly husband.

I think the one thing that really needs to be reaffirmed for girls is that the world we live in is screwed up and its value system is in direct opposition to the Kingdom of God.

This is highly evident in how girls in our society are constantly told that their value comes from their physical appearance and sex appeal, when the truth is that God values each of them equally and loves them with an unconditional love that is better than anything they can chase after in this life. I guess you could extend that to say (in a more quotable form)…

“Stay away from any guy who feeds you the lie that your value is intrinsically tied to your physical appearance and what you can offer them sexually.”

Caleb

I received an email from Rebekah Hoefnagels last week.  This is what it said…

Hey Jay, I was on your website today and I found it very interesting. I am passionate about the way women treat others and get treated negatively in our culture. I am not a feminist but I think that girls too often get sucked into false things (reality tv shows, clothing, popularity etc).

This is something I wrote a bit ago, that you haven’t touched on (from what I could see) on the website that I think should be addressed. it’s just an idea, pull ideas from it if you like and write something more relevant to the website. and Beware: It’s just a bunch of random thoughts thrown together.

Which is great, because this entire website is just a bunch of random thoughts thrown together!  As you can see, Rebekah is passionate that women learn to live right.  Which makes me very happy.  Check out her thoughts below…

This is Rebekah.

Don’t you love getting told that you are beautiful?

That you made a difference in someone’s life?

That you are funny?

We all know that sometimes a comment can either brighten our day or ruin it. So why is it that we continue to judge people and comment about their lives that we really don’t know anything about?

Yes a girl may have done something mean to you but that doesn’t mean you should go and tell others that she is a terrible person. A girl may not be up on the latest fashion trends but that doesn’t mean that she is out of touch with reality and won’t be hurt when you make fun of her clothes. And even if we don’t cut people down we still don’t go out of our way to encourage them.

For some reason subconsciously we think that if we tell someone they did a good job or look nice or are funny then that means they are better then us. We want to be at the top, the best in hopes of increasing our self-esteem. But all this competition just hurts us. Instead of having a group of close friends you will have a group of girls you are competing against so you don’t tell them your fears, struggles, and weaknesses.

When you truly believe that “you are fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) and that your identity lies in Christ (not in the clothes you own, the friends you have, the sports you play), encouraging others will come easily.

As females we need to come together and lift each other up. Too often in the media we get told to look a certain way, have certain interests, and date a lot to be confident. But our confidence comes from Christ. If we expect guys to treat us with respect we need to start treating each other with respect.

And if we don’t get treated with respect, don’t turn around and talk about it to someone else, forgive. “May we understand that forgiveness doesn’t justify the other person’s actions; instead, it makes us free.” I challenge you go against the flow and encourage those around you.

Rebekah

“Trials and troubles may seem to overwhelm you. They cannot do more than work my will, and that will you have said is your will. Do you see that you cannot be destroyed? From now a new life is opening out before you. Yours to enter into the kingdom I have prepared for you. The Sunlight of my presence is on your paths. Trust and go forward unafraid. My Grace is sufficient for all your needs.”

-A.J. Russell, God Calling

Some of you may really be struggling right now.  Maybe you are going through a break-up.  Or struggling with a severe illness.  Or having to hear your parents fight.  Or mourning over the loss of a loved one.

During my first year of university I went through a rough break-up, which was followed by the death of my best friend in a car accident 2 months later.  A year of darkness followed.  I remember hating waking up every morning because the reality would wash over me like a torrent.  My struggle can be summed up in one of my journal entries from that year:

“God, I feel like I’m drowning. Drowning in pain, confusion, doubts, and anger. The storm is raging against me, all around me, and I am so tired. I just want to give up. Relationships are not worth it because they all just end. God, where the hell are you? Why are you pounding me? JUST STOP IT - I am so tired - I can’t live like this. Please just DO something. You are so distant.”

I remember having the choice to either go through my pain with God, or to shake my fist and do it by my own strength. I chose to go through it with Him, and looking back I see how closely He held me through it all.

If a crisis in your life has brought you to a crossroads, I encourage you to walk through it with God.  He is not afraid of your confusion, anger, bitterness, or resentment.  He loves it when you are real and he loves you even when you don’t have energy to say or do anything.  Rest in Him, and he will give you peace.

Michelle