Last week Jay went to Chicago for a couple days, and I got to spend some time catching up with friends and visiting family in Guelph.  It was awesome!  Guelph, with its eco-friendly stores and fair trade coffee shops, was a welcome break from “steel city’s” factories and traffic. 

One evening I was having tea with a friend that I haven’t seen for a while, and she told me about a lesson she has been learning lately: self pity is self worship.  It has a strange ring to it, but I think it is very true.  I have often found myself pitying myself for various reasons.  Here’s a list of things that either I have pitied myself for or seen others pity themselves over:

I’m not as pretty as her
I’m not smart enough to do anything of value
My family is not as loving/fun/adventurous/supportive as theirs
All my friends are dating and I’m still single
All my friends are getting married and I’m still single
My boyfriend dumped me
I’m not making as much money as they are
I’m too tall/ too dark/ too white/ too skinny/ too fat
My marks aren’t good enough

All these things can be painful and are certainly legitimate things to struggle with.  But do we allow them to take over our thoughts and lives? Do they start shaping our actions? I believe that self-pity can lead to negative and harmful actions, like developing eating disorders, harbouring resentment and bitterness toward others, having a bad attitude, refusing to take healthy risks, dressing immodestly to get attention, or just giving up on life.  These actions are the fruit of idolatry.  We idolize ourselves, our comfort, and our pride over the God of the universe, who made us, loves us, blesses us, equips us, forgives us, and believes in us. 

Don’t get me wrong; God wants us to be real with Him.  He understands that there are times we are so broken and hurt we can’t even express it in words.  But I know that in my life, choosing to dwell in self-pity leads to nothing more than regrets and frustration.  God tells us in His word to dwell in Him.  So let’s cancel our pity parties for this week and do that instead, because He alone can provide us with the strength to carry on.

Love you girls!
Michelle